My favorite decoration is a photograph – a single photograph captures a memory that speaks a thousand words and adds infinite splashes of color to any room. My room is full of photographs – photographs that capture memories spanning all the way back to when I was two years old, running around, trying to keep up with my older brother, to now as a 23 year old young woman who has graduated from college, met incredible people, and fell in love with European travel. Before I fall asleep, and when I wake up, these photographs greet and leave me thankful for everything I have been blessed to experience and live through thus far. A simple photograph reminds me to keep smiling that American smile I was known for in Česky Têšín 🙂
Over two weeks ago now I was supposed to return home from my Fulbright grant – two weeks ago, 10 months of independently living and teaching in the Czech Republic was supposed to be celebrated. The farewells and goodbyes would be hard but there was supposed to be closure, followed by feelings of pride, accomplishment, and, of course, newly rooted love.
For the past few months I was definitely shook by the fact that this farewell celebration was not the reality. Everything just ended so quickly and my grant rapidly slipped through my fingers without leaving me anytime to try and save the time and keep it alive. Instead of a celebratory farewell, my last week in Česky Têšín felt like I was rudely awakened from a dream…and then never given the chance for some closure to see how the dream would conclude.
All this said, while learning to ride the unpredictability of this pandemic, and any plans I try to carve for myself, I have also learned to keep life in perspective and to establish my own sense of closure. I have many photographs, maps, and memories displayed in my room to remind me to try and remember this and keep that smile beaming always 🙂
My time in the Czech Republic was a privilege and a very special gift – a time that may not have concluded how I planned, but a time that stays very close to my heart, and continually brightens my perspective each and every day. Upon returning to the US, I knew this in my heart to be true but was reminded again in the shape of a lovingly made photo book, sent to me from my beautiful Czech family, living in the city square in Česky Têšín, a place I used to return to every day after work.
The book was sent to me all the way in Andover and is pouring with thoughtfulness, compassion, and the invaluable love of family as it epitomizes the place that was nearly impossible for me to leave. Each page is a reminder of the family that helped to keep me grounded, and made me feel so loved, while navigating the life I was able to carve for myself 4,000 miles away from my hometown in the US. This book is neatly bound together, and holds many many photographs, and excerpts from this very blog, that capture the surreal, undeniably challenging, and inexplicably beautiful essence of cultural immersion. These photographs hold once in a lifetime memories and speak a thousand words and then some. These photographs are tangible proof of the closure I will always be able to carry with me.
For the longest time, the devastating news of evacuating this Fulbright life consumed my memories and ability to be fully present in my work and life in the US. My year felt incomplete and I couldn’t bring myself to end the chapter of my life I am most proud of. Now, this seems absurd. Instead, I choose to remember and cherish the 7 months I spent abroad as a time I, as cheesy as it may sound, was lucky enough to live my dream – teaching, learning, traveling and growing – challenging myself to stay true to the person I know I can be, despite spurts of loneliness, fear, and frustration, and live life through brighter, more resilient eyes – surrounding myself with genuine family adventure, uncontrollable laughter, and humbling, once-in-a-lifetime experiences.
So, without further ado, here’s to my own farewell celebration.
And…How will I remember?
My Massive Suitcase Lugged Across the Globe – From Boston to Frankfurt to Prague and finally to Česky Têšín
I have never had to pack up my life for an entire year and up until a week before my grant began, the thought of leaving my home in Andover, and the beautiful summer I was able to have, still didn’t quite feel real. So…10 months worth of packing was squeezed into 48 hours and the massive weight of the two suitcases I lugged across the globe definitely showed my unpreparedness! I will never forget how hard it was to transport these suitcases from the Prague Airport to the train (and how many stares and little laughs I received!) and the relief I felt when finally arriving in Česky Têšín and placing my suitcases in the elevator of Roman and Pavlina’s flat (And the memory of Pavlina’s shock at my suitcases will never not make me smile!! 🙂 )
The Feeling of Warmth I Immediately Felt Sipping Hot Cocoa and Biscoff Cookies (My Ultimate Favorite!) in Roman and Pavlina’s Flat My First Night.
By the time I reached Roman and Pavlina’s flat on the night of August 25, I had been traveling for 24 hours, and was still processing all the goodbyes I said before leaving. I was emotionally and physically spent and had no data to message loved ones back home. I can’t quite put to words how soothing and calming it was to share the simple childhood joys of hot cocoa and cookies with who I would very quickly call my Czech mom.
Bracing Myself to Buy Peanut Butter
Peanut butter is a staple in my diet and before last year I never thought twice before simply picking up a jar at the grocery store. I distinctly remember bracing myself, taking a few deep breaths, before walking into a Czech grocery store for the first time. I did everything I could to prepare myself to search for peanut butter in Czech but still arrived home with a jar of chocolate nugget butter! Pavlina and my Czech students gave me a tour of the grocery store a couple weeks later. This was very humbling and now I got to say I’m a pro….by the end of my stay I could even find almond butter 🙂
Meeting Fellow Fulbrighters in Brno for Orientation
By the time I had to leave for my Fulbright orientation I had been in Česky Têšín for all of three days and was still living out of my massive, stuffed suitcase. I had no flat, bank account, cell service, and absolutely no idea how I was going to establish myself without being able to even hold a basic conversation in Czech. And the last thing I wanted to do was hop on another couple trains and a bus and head to another unknown Czech city. However, my time in Brno gifted brought friends who would soon be able to share and reflect on our time in the Czech Republic with me. Together we learned that our struggles trying to live and teach abroad are very real and normal and we can celebrate and help each other through all successes, challenges, and laughs that come our way. When I arrived at Brno and met a small group of Fulbrighters, I joked with them saying, “Yes I don’t really have much planned out right now and not a clue what I’m doing…but give me another week and I am going to be thriving!” I said this jokingly but little did I know later that night I would receive a message from Roman with info about my new flat, my life would come together and….yes I would thrive!
First Sight of Prague – Zizkov Tower
The first time I took a train to Prague by myself I was definitely struck by the immense size of this city! One night while on a Fulbright conference, I was able to share a breathtaking view of the city with a couple Fulbright friends – this view symbolizes the rich history, aesthetic, and charm of Prague, the heart of Europe. Each and every time I stepped off the train and into Prague I remembered this view and smiled at the thought of how familiar and comfortable I was becoming with my role as a Fulbright Teaching Assistant in the Czech Republic.
First Hike and Climb in Slovakia
My first first of many firsts (now that is a mouthful!) 🙂 The first hike I did with Roman and Pavlina in Slovakia was my first taste of the unforgettable (and physically challenging or as Roman sometimes said “a little complicated”!!) adventures I was going to be able to experience in the months ahead. When I went off hiking, running, climbing, and skiing with Roman and Pavlina, I always forgot about any stress or fears I was feeling and I just let myself live and be happy. The simplicity of these adventures reminded me of my childhood memories – I didn’t expect to be given the opportunity to return to the simple joys of family trips and adventures and I am eternally grateful this was ever-present (and still present!) for me throughout my time abroad.
Climbing at Strefa & Car rides with Roman
After my lessons, and throughout the school day, I would always receive messages from Roman asking about our visit to Strefa’s indoor climbing gym in Cieszyn, Poland. Then, we would agree on a day and time, Roman would pick me up from my flat, and we would share an evening of climbing together. Roman spent our time at Strefa teaching me new tips and tricks so I would feel prepared for the rocks of Bohemia in the spring. He would always ask me, “Sarah, now how about something special?” and he would challenge me to push past my comfort zone, test my new climbing abilities, and together we would laugh at and push my fears, and overcome them, together. These evenings were very special and I loved every minute I was able to share my Czech dad’s most prized hobby with him. I even loved the car rides there because Roman and I would laugh about each other’s day and discuss any stories we could think about sharing. These memories will stick with me as pivotal to my time in Česky Têšín and I refuse to believe that the last time I entered Strefa was the last time.
Teaching with Pavlina and pre and post lessons in the Chemistry Office
I would arrive at Pavlina’s office every morning at around 7:30 and be greeted with a heaping cup of green tea and sometimes a little treat from her weekend bakes. We would come up with lessons together within minutes then execute them and enjoy learning from and teaching with each other. We thrived off each other’s energy and to this day I miss thinking about what English lessons I am going to teach and share during the week with my Czech mom. And seeing her at the gym dominate everybody right after school always brightened my afternoon 🙂
Meetings with Courtney to Catch Up and Debrief
I was extremely fortunate to be placed in my host city with a fellow American Fulbrighter. I remember nervously texting Courtney while finishing up my thesis at Bates, then, within minutes, excitedly texting her about what we were looking forward to the most during the year and gushing over the fact that I immediately had a friend to travel with come August. We met for weekly dinners and coffees and I always loved being able to catch up and reflect on our different experiences in the Czech Republic together.
PUB!!!
Roman: “Sarah, maybe another one??” Sarah: “Sure!” This simple exchange represents my typical conversation in my Czech family’s favorite pub.
Roman, Pavlina, and I were regulars at a pub right in the city square and this spot was such a nice time to relax and debrief the day and prep for the weekend. We were there so often, it got to the point where the waitress would bring over draft Radegast beer without me asking and if I wasn’t there with Roman and Pavlina many would question my whereabouts!
Monday Tea in Roman and Pavlina’s flat – And Weekly Bread!!
In the winter it was too cold to sit outside at our favorite pub, so every Monday I was invited for tea and sweets at Roman and Pavlina’s flat. It was the perfect way to ease into the week and I was charmed by even more simple laughter and shared anecdotes every Monday visit. When I went to leave, I was always given fresh, warm bread from a little cafe in Karvina – Roman and I shared a love for this bread and it always complimented every one of my meals and gave me a wonderful feeling of hearth during the week.
Primary School in Ostrava
My visits to the elementary school in Ostrava reminded me of how much I love surrounding myself with the pure innocence of children. These primary school children arrived to my lessons with so much energy, happiness, and respect and gave me undeniable hope that they will grow to be enthusiastic, kind, and brilliant learners of the English language in the near future!
TEACHING of course and my English Office
I have known that I wanted to be an English teacher since I was a junior in high school. The empathy, dedication, and brilliance my Modern American literature teacher shared with me my junior year of high school inspired me and left me vowing to myself that one day I would share the same level of compassion with my students. Being able to start my career by teaching the basics of the English language, and important aspects of American culture, with my students was the perfect stepping stone for my passion to continue to grow. Teaching at Gymnazium Josefa Bozka challenged me to think about the intricacies of my speech and how important it is to clearly express the purpose and value of every lesson. The students and staff of Gymnazium Josefa Bozka were some of my best friends and a huge part of the reason why this school became my second home in Česky Têšín.
Wandering and Running around Cieszyn and Sipping Coffee at Cafes
The perfect way to spend some time alone, let my thoughts and emotions race and explore the unique, historic, and charming Polish side of my city was to run along the Olza River and then bop around various cafes. I found many trails, beautiful views, and quaint cafes (where I wrote almost all my blogs!). These runs always left me feeling so lucky that I could easily navigate my Czech home while still learning and finding new spots every day.
Alex’s November Trip and Weekly WhatsApp Catch-Ups, Letters in the Mail, and Hellos/Goodbyes
Before Alex arrived at the Prague airport in November, I distinctly remember being on a call with my mom, nervously chatting about what it was going to feel like to see him walk through Arrivals and into my Czech life. Long distance was extremely tough – a 6 hour time difference certainly didn’t make communication easy. But, we tackled the barrier as best we could with weekly WhatsApp catch-ups (all of which left me very happy and going to bed smiling after a long day), voice memos and sporadic letters in the mail. As soon as I saw him walk through the doors, after 3 months of being a part, all my worries seemed pointless – from that moment on we were able to share a beautiful week together in Prague and Dresden, exploring classic tourist attractions, Christmas markets, breathtaking hikes, and authentic foods and drinks. The empathy and understanding I received from his visit meant the world to me and now I have photographs of this trip displayed in my room to remind me of this special time spent together. All the hellos and goodbyes in the Boston and Prague airport truly tested the distance as well. It’s easy to feel disconnected from so far away. However, all in all, the distance actually served as an important test of strength and a reminder of all the loved ones I have in the US and how much support and love I always had, and was able to share, from 4,000 miles away.
Feeling of Home Upon Stepping off the Train and Entering my Tiny Little Flat Each and Every Time Arriving Back to Česky Têšín and the Jingle of all my Keys.
Who knew a little Czech/Polish city and a flat that housed the tiniest kitchen and the brightest orange walls could feel so much like home? 7 months ago, I had no idea that this feeling could exist but still carry it with me as I live my life in Andover today.
All of these listed memories represent many from an infinitely long list I was able to gather during my 7 month stay. Reading this list back, and reflecting on all the others I could add, reminds me of how even the smallest feats, like being able to buy peanut butter successfully at the grocery store, can shine the brightest light on your day.
So, how will I remember my time as a Fulbright scholar in the Czech Republic? I will remember it as a humbling time, where I truly learned to let myself live, feel, and relish all experiences, emotions, memories, and challenges that came my way. I will remember my time in the Czech Republic as a time I learned more about how I wanted others to see me and how I wanted to be able to see and love myself.
This mentality does not only pose true for my Fulbright year but also the recent months of my return to the United States…and the rest of my life for the matter! During quarantine it is easy to remember, and dwell on, the frustration and all the roadblocks that many of us are facing. However, how will I choose to remember the past four months when I unexpectedly had to come home?
I will remember driving home from New York with my mom while she shared how happy and thankful she was for Roman and Pavlina and then unpacking all my belongings and transforming my brother’s old room (sorry Erich!!) into a space of my own. I will remember Frank, my family’s chocolate lab, jump up onto the patio table, lie down, and fall asleep snoring next to me with his face resting on my keyboard as I work. I will remember Jackie, my family’s new black lab, bringing her leash to me every morning while wiggling her entire tiny little body over to me while I am eating breakfast. I will remember strawberry picking with Grace and Joe, my little sister and brother, and then picnics and dinner dates with Alex in my background and at our family’s homes. I will remember hearty family dinners, warm days in Boston eating sushi in the North End, and cozy lake house evenings in a lovely A-Frame house in Sandown, New Hampshire. Finally, I will remember weekly FaceTime calls with Roman and Pavlina, ensuring that we stay in touch and bring each other up after our emotional separation.
Small moments can come together to stand for some of the brightest memories – and speak a thousand words about the simplest, but most important, aspects of life. Each day is made up of a series of moments – some challenging and devastating, some frustrating, some hilarious, and some absolutely amazing. And then a whole lot in between. When I feel down or frustrated I think of all the beautiful photographs and memories I have collected over the years, and all the blogs I have written during this year – and I immediately feel uplifted and ok.
This year has been the wildest roller coaster ride I have ever ridden – but also the most incredible, stimulating, and eye-opening. I choose to remember this year proudly and keep growing as the strong, independent woman who was able to face her fears and conquer new ones – and meet lifelong family members along the way. I couldn’t ask for a better 7 month Fulbright grant and I am very thankful for everybody who has helped me every step of the way.
So, of course, as always…ahoj! I don’t know what’s next….but hey, I know I will be able to accomplish strong feats regardless of what’s ahead. Find your favorite photo book, photo, or letter. Smile and cherish the memories and use them to move forward and grow that much stronger 🙂
Redefining Escape 
Great blog Sarah! Quite a journey!
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